HEY!!!!!!!!!! I'M BACK!

Hehehe, It has been a while since I last posted here...too busy.

If Sir Vlad hadn't asked me to write again, I may have not even remembered I had a blog...

I got a job...but I don't really know if I'm going to benefit from it in terms of money...I just wish I can handle everything...

I had a horrible dream...

A man shot me.

It's a good thing he missed...

But even though he missed, it's not really a good thing...

I'll be in one of the most aggravating times of my life...hahaha.

God help me...

Sorry guys, if it has to be this way...

But now, with everthing in my life not going right, I've come to a major decision...I will never give up...I will never surrender...Even if it takes me getting sick and tired everyday just to support myself...I know...This is another major turning point in my life and I am willing to accept the challenge...

I will live...

I won't be afraid...

I will reach my goals no matter what...

Even if it may mean taking the competition out of the game...

This is my defiance.

Haha, I found my Chemsoc pin. It was just hiding underneath my ID inside my wallet...sigh...

Am I jealous...?

I know I'm not, but why am I acting this way...?

Is there anything I should be jealous about...?

Hahaha, it was a nice day today until I discovered that my Chemsoc pin was missing...huhuhu.

Hahaha...short quips.

Sa lagas at lantang dahon,
Bawat oras naiipon,
Hinihintay ang pagbangon
Ng nahimbing sa kahapon.

Ugali kong tuwina
Pagtunog ng kampana
Magdasal sa dambana
Katulad ng kanina.

Ang kamay ko ay tumagos
Sa salaming umaagos
At sa akin ay naglagos
Ang buhay ng punong igos.

Di-kaila ang hapo
Sa kanyang pagkaupo,
Kamay ay nakadapo
Sa paang hinihipo.

Kasing-puti ng sutana
Ang kurtina sa bukana
Na napunit ng katana.
Hindi ko na alintana.

Iyo na bang nalaman
Kung ano ang halaman
Na sinangkap sa laman
Ng inuming gulaman?

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WA POISE!

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Sa kinasamaang palad, dinapuan ng langaw ang kinakain kong spaghetti carbonara. Nainis ako nang mapansin ko iyon at di ko na muling tinignan ang aking plato. Tumayo na lang ako at umalis habang pinapanood niya ako. Ngunit sa biglang pagtalikod ko, nabangga ko ang sarili ko sa sandalan ng upuan. Aray, masakit, sabi ko sa sarili ko nang maramdaman ko ang tigas ng bakal sa aking tagiliran. Natawa siya habang namimilipit ako sa kirot. Ngunit sa pagtawa niya, bigla siyang nabulunan at sa kanyang pag-ubo, lumabas ang isang hibla ng spaghetti mula sa ilong niya. Ngayon, ako naman ang natawa.

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SA UNANG PAGKIKITA

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Nakakatuwa naman, siya pala iyon.

Hindi ako nagpahalata na ako ang dapat niyang katagpuin nang dumaan ako sa harapan niya. Bitbit ko pa rin ang walang laman na bote ng apple-flavored iced tea na paborito ko. Sa di ko malamang dahilan, natapon iyon kanina sa panakaiingat-ingatan kong itim na polo habang umiinom ako. Sana hindi niya napansin na may dumaang amoy mansanas. Matamis.

Nakaisang metro na ang nalakad ko mula sa kanya bago ako muling lumingon sa kanyang direksyon. Ha, astig, green pala na polo ang suot niya. Ayaw ko pa man din ng green, pero kahit na, bagay naman sa kanya. Dalang-dala.

Aray!

Di ko namalayan na may tao pala sa harapan ko.

Sorry po.

Ano ba yan? Nakakahiya ka, sabi ko sa sarili ko. Buti na lang hindi siya nakatingin. Dinaanan ko ang malaking bulletin board ng mga activities ng kolehiyo bago ako tumigil sa may railing at doon sumandal, nakatingin pa rin sa kanya. May kausap siyang iba. Baka naman kasama niya. Hinubad niya ang kanyang salamin at pinunasan ito. Aba, in fairness, may hitsura siya. Pero parang mas gusto ko pa rin kapag suot niya ang salamin niya. Gusto ko kasi sa mga taong nakasalamin. Misteryoso.

Tatlong minuto na ang pinalipas kong nakatitig pa rin sa kanya. Naroon pa rin yung kasama niya. Mukhang foreigner, Koreano malamang. Ayoko sa ibang mga Koreano. Di ko gusto ang mga asal nila, lalo na ang boses nila kapag nakikipagusap. Masyado kasing mababa at mabilis ang pagsasalita nila. Nakakagulat.

Napagod ako sa kahihintay, di pa rin umaalis yung kausap niyang Koreano. Ayaw ko nang maghintay, kaya nagsimula na akong lumapit ng dahan-dahan. Pagdaan ko sa malaking salamin sa bulletin board na di ko pinansin kanina, pinagmasdan ko ang sarili ko at inayos ng kaunti ang aking nangangamoy manamis-namis na baro. Wala namang balakubak sa aking mga balikat, buti na lang. Dahil sa kakalagay ng gel ko sa buhok para umayos, minsan nagkakaroon na ako ng balakubak. Mahilig pa man din ako sa damit na itim. Malagim.

Matapos kung purihin ang sarili ko sa harap ng salamin, dumiretso na ako papunta sa kanya. Kinakabahan ako. Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko. Alam kaya niya na ako ang dapat niyang katagpuin? Ayaw ko ng ganitong pakiramdam. Nakakakaba.

Kahit gusto kong magsalita, hindi ko magawa. Guwapo naman ako ah, bakit hindi ko kayang harapin siya? May ipagmamalaki naman ako. Magugustuhan naman niya siguro ako. Ngunit hindi ko man lamang mapilit ang sarili ko na batiin siya o kaya’y tanungin man lamang kung siya nga ang taong hinahanap ko. Nasa harapan ko na siya, ngunit ang nagagawa ko lamang ay tumayo at tumango. Nakakahiya.

Hindi ko na alam ang nangyari pagkatapos, ngunit umalis bigla ang Koreanong kausap niya. Tumayo siya mula sa kanyang kinauupuang baitang at lumapit sa akin. Hinawakan niya ang aking mukhang hindi ko man lamang mapilit na iharap sa kanya, mukhang puno ng pangamba sa maaaring hindi niya pagtanggap sa akin. At dahan-dahan niyang inangat ang aking ulo hanggang sa nagsalubong ang aking mga mata sa kanya. Kahit ang mga salamin niya’y hindi kayang maikubli ang pananabik na kanyang nadarama. Pareho kaming ang mga mata’y uhaw sa pagtingin ng isa’t isa. Malumanay na sumambulat mula sa kanyang mga labi ang mga unang katagang nasabi niya sa akin sa unang pagkikitang ito.

“Matagal na kitang hinahanap…aking kuya.”

Hmmm...nothing to do. Why not post a little prose in here for a change?

We will always be. I know. 

Sigh, I miss you guys 

Sigh, it had really been a rough day for me...it's really sad...maybe I'll just write something about it...

Yes!!! After everything I've been through, I finally made it! I passed my Chem 153 subject! Woohoo! I just need to really work hard enough so I can be a true chemist! Just waiting for my classcard in MPs 10...

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A BLADE LOST IN DARKNESS

---

A sparkle from afar
Says death comes near
And in an instant
I fall, unmoving.

The light around me fades
As the darkness devours
The whole of me as
I fall, unmoving.

Warmth now escapes
From my unfeeling chest,
The blade's bloody sheath.
I fall, unmoving.

The untimely fusion
Of steel and flesh forges
A blade lost in darkness as
I fall, unmoving.

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PAGYUKOD KO’Y PINAGMASDAN KO ANG LUPA

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Pagyukod ko’y pinagmasdan ko ang lupa,
Buhanging pinupukaw ng mga alon,
At pumulot ng sigay na naglipana.

Bata akong lumaking nakatingala
Sa palalong alapaap, kaya ngayon,
Pagyukod ko’y pinagmasdan ko ang lupa.

Sa bagong tanawin ako’y natulala,
Nilimot ko ang pagdaan ng panahon
At pumulot ng sigay na naglipana.

Buong buhay ko’y langit ang tinamasa,
At ngayong namulat mula sa kahapon,
Pagyukod ko’y pinagmasdan ko ang lupa.

Ang buhangin pala ay sanlibong tala,
Nabanggit ko sa unang pagkakataon
At pumulot ng sigay na naglipana.

Ako’y sumalungat sa dating adhika,
Pariwarang langit na aking pinoon.
Pagyukod ko’y pinagmasdan ko ang lupa
At pumulot ng sigay na naglipana.

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SAMEDI

---

Walang anumang pagpansin pa sa mundo,
Sa musika, sa halakhak o sa gulo
Habang naghihintay sa may isang kanto
Dito sa Paris, isang gabi, Sabado.

Kanina pa nakasandal sa lampara
At pinipilit na maaninag kita
Waring tulad ng aking naaalala
Sa panaginip ko kaninang umaga.

Pilit kong minamasid ng matiyaga
Ang bawat pagkilos ng ulikbang madla
Hanggang sa ika’y lumitaw mula sa laksa
At sukuban ang aking puso ng tuwa.

Sana’y daanan mo ako sa pagliko
Dito sa kanto ng umaasang puso.
Ang Paris ay unti-unting natutuyo
Sa bawat Sabadong ako’y ‘yong binigo.

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AMANG DAGAT, INANG LUPA

---

Marahang dumadampi ang belong tubig
Sa mukha ng batong laging nakikinig
Sa talong malumanay na humihimig
Ng basang awit sa katugunang lamig.

Ngunit ang awit ay biglang nagpapalit
Ang maraha’y raragsa sa ilang saglit
At sa kamay ng tubig na nangangalit
Ang bato’y mabubuwal, paulit-ulit.

Kahit nananatiling lubhang tahimik
Ang bato sa dusa ng pagtatangkilik
Sa awit ng tubig, kaniyang katalik,
Mailalabas din niya ang hagikgik.

At sa huli’y maaaninag rin nila
Ang lubos na pagsinta ng ama’t ina
Sa dalampasigan ng aking gunita
Ng kanyang pagtanggi sa aking pagsinta.

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IKAW

---

Sa akin, ang bawat kataga ay luha.
Ang bawat tuldok ay marka ng pagkutya.
Ang bawat pantig ay iyong paggahasa
Sa pagtula ng aking musmos na diwa.

Sa akin, iyong puso ay talipandas
Na salita’y pakpak na pumapagaspas
Ngunit sa totoo pala’y paang gasgas
Sa iyong paglalakad sa ibang landas.

Sa akin, iyong pagsuyo ay oyayi
Na mula sa kaliluhan ihinabi
At sa aking paghimbing ay magkukubli
Sa dantay ng kumot ng ibang haligi.

Sa akin, ang bawat awitin ay ulan.
Ang tinig mo’y kulog sa aking isipan
Ngunit kahit bagyo ang kinasadlakan,
Sa basang lupa ko muling sisimulan.

Oh yeah, after many months of dormancy, I'm back! Alive and kicking, eh? Hahahaha. By the way, I'm now posting my pieces from my Malikhaing Pagsulat 10 class. It's written (of course) in Tagalog, so anybody foreign might not appreciate it, but to those who understand, please enjoy!

Oh yeah, even if it's summer, it's still autumn in my page. Still learning how to use Photoshop eh?! Hahahaha!

Silence is the gentlest way to submit oneself to another, but it is also the cruelest way to dominate oneself over another.

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DANCE IN THE STARLIGHT

---

Standing still as time passes me by,
I wait for azure to turn to ebony sky
For when the breeze shifts from sea to land,
I will lift my feet from their place in the sand.

I will run against the swift dusk breeze
Into the midst of the towering trees
And the life I breathe and the death I abhor
Will folloW my foosteps on the forest floor.

Run I will through the barricades of bark
As silence and stillness will continue to hark
Like the whisper of my long lost muse
For me to come there, I will not refuse!

For the wounds of my face can never heal
But my beauty beneath, the dark will reveal.
Though I am bound to sadness, far from grace
Free I will be in the night's gentle embrace.

I will reach the heart of the leafy intricacy
Where starlight floods down from broken canopy.
There I will, like a flower in May,
Unfurl myself from my grief in my day.

I will sway my arms, as do blades of grass
Under the mercy of everyday winds that pass.
However tired my feet, I'll step back and forth
Upon the firm but soothing forest earth.

Time will dictate the cadence of my dance.
Everything will move in a clockwork trance.
As the owl will watch, the foxes will stop
And join me in every skip and hop.

As I whirl, my tears will turn into mist
And be spun at every turn of my wrist
Into a veil to drape me and in its embrace
Relieve my soul from pain's every trace.

The stars will shift to the beat of the night
As I will dance away my sorrow and my fright
But every dark night the dawn will cut like a knife
To let me live again in my unending strife.

Standing still as time passes me by,
I wait for azure to turn to ebony sky
For when the night comes to hide my scars,
I will take my place amidst the stars!

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THE RING IN THE LAKE

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Sky on earth, moon on ground
Star on surface tells of the drowned
Yet the night makes no sound
The lake speaks of stillness around.

Yet the man stood unbowed,
A brave heart beating proud.
Though the dead silence rings loud
From a once scenice, now fouled,
Lake where the living are not allowed.

Sky on earth, moon on ground
Star on surface tells of the drowned
In the lake where death stays bound
To the ring that enchantments surround.

Yet the dirt path the man trod
Closer to the lake his feet he'd prod,
Wading them in the flesh-laden mud
In quest for the ring covered in blood,
Killing people as does a flood.

Sky on earth, moon on ground
Star on surface is the ring of the drowned
Though the deadly lure stays bound,
The man of light is still not downed.

As into the lake the man submerged,
The chill into his spine had surged.
As fair skin and dark water merged,
Deeper into the lake he lurced.
The dead-filled water he swam and searched.

Sky above, moon in sky
Stars in heavens watched him try
To fulfill his journey even if he'd die
And drown in the lake without a cry.

And underneath him came a sight
A vision of gold and much delight
Yet the brave man of light,
Beautiful to have as it might,
Knows the curse of the night.

Sky on earth, moon on ground
Star on surface of the cursed and drowned
Vain is the lure of gold still bound
As the man remains unbowed.

At last the glitter of the ring was seen
By the man who was no doubt keen
And with a heart pure and clean,
The spirit of light and life within,
Shattered the ring with a force unseen.

Sky on earth, moon on ground
Star on surface is nowhere around
The curse is broken and death unbound
By the man who remained unbowed.

Hey guys, I've just finished something. Have a look-see! You may even download them for free. I'm still trying to learn Adobe Photoshop 7 and Macromedia Fireworks MX skills so if you have any comments, tips and suggestions, please post them here.

These pics are 800x600, so you may use them as wallpapers for your desktop. Thanks!

I call this collection "Collection 1: A Time To Hide"

1. Aegean Naiad

2. Queen of Autumn Leaves

3. Frost Maiden

4. Elusive Dryad

Hope you enjoy!!!

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THE ICE COFFIN

---

Silver streaks fly past through the night sky.
The moonshine wanes as every moment passes by
And underneath the starlight, I lie in wait
For the owl to sing his last lullaby.

Moving in closer, the clouds shower a snowy blight.
The wind whispers for me to move and take flight
But underneath the starlight, I lie in wait
For the moon to disappear from my sight.

Silver streaks from the shattered moon fill the sky.
The owl finishes and flies in the wind hurtling by
But underneath the starlight, I lie in wait
For the snow to embrace me as I die.

Is it me, or is everything around me disappearing one by one...?

?

There are things in life that need no explanation, although one might be puzzled over them and think of them as much as they could, only to find out that in the end that all answers are simple...well, most are.

Ahhhhh...would somebody please pour me a glass of inspiration?

I guess nobody would understand the way I love...

Somebody...

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FAR HORIZON

---

I bend to pick up a shell on the sand
The wave crawls forth into my hand
Like your caress, I miss it, much.

My feet sink into the wet sand of woes
The pebbles sift in between my toes
Like your fingers, i miss them, much.

I lay myself on a rock by the shore
Smiling to myself, thinking of before
Of your face, I miss it, much.

My eyes wander far out into the horizon
I try to search the world for a reason
For you to come back, for I miss you, much.

But all I see are waters and skies
The flame and freeze to my teary eyes
That long for you, missing you, much.

Maybe you are the sky, and I, the sea
Though we seem as close as we can be,
Really far apart are we, much.

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OF BEING AND NOTHINGNESS

---

In pitch black hearts of disarray
Flows the breath of life imbued in clay,
The blood-stained murk of Adam's paradise
Dictating humankind's ultimate demise
In the wings of the vultures of confusion
Embracing souls in feathers of temptation.
As their prey fall numb to the false rapture,
Their talons shred the masks of the demure
And as the thoughts of bloody darkness divulge,
The maggots of insatiety and greed indulge,
Feeding upon the reeking corpse of reason,
The stench of malice, the mind in poison,
The ruin of flesh, the denial of existence.
Death lurks in the continuous emergence
Of notorious brainchildren, forging destruction.
The purpose of all knowledge cast into oblivion.
And the frames of time will reveal nothing.
Void will reign, the end in stillness devastating.
The life all conceived, witnessed, and bore,
To death, no more, no more.

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BREAKWATER MEMORIES

---

The seething waves crashed onto the shore
Driven by the winds of ancient lore.
Only slight embers from the beacon
Broke the emptiness of the old season
And in the starkness of the dead sky,
My lady sought a place to cry
Where she could view the dawning light
Shine on her face of sorrowful plight,
A face of beauty yet devoid of it
With pain marked in every single bit.
In such distress when seabirds don't fly,
My lady walked to the edge withought a sigh
And as her feet lost touch of their place,
The sea caught and held her in its embrace
And the vicious gale swept to grasp her
But it only caught her tears for winter.

And so it arrived, all her memories forlorn.
All sounds drowned by the distant foghorn.

I already have plans for my One-Winged Angel series. Watch out.

Hey, I need comments please? Hehehehe. Thanks.

---

DJINN

---

The sands shift as I tip my hourglass.
Ah, it has been a while since we met,
He, the master of me, the djinn in my mind.

As I watch the grains slowly trickle down
The bottleneck, yes, I remember him well,
He, laughing condescendingly, the djinn in my mind,

For like a spirit, he comes to me
But bids me farewell the instant he came.
He, always transient, the djinn in my mind.

Yet, I run into him in my every step
Here in this lifeless desert for a city,
He, the omnipotent, the djinn in my mind,

Because I know, he is bound to me so
By the threads of love and fate intertwining.
He, forever my slave, the djinn in my mind,

For in me, he seeks my comforting
And in him, I wait for love to grow,
He, forever my love, the djinn in my mind.

Now, I wait for him to come and kiss me,
And fall with me into our love's treacherous depth,
He, the magnificent, the djinn in my mind.

In each other's grasp, we are one and same,
Insanely a single heartfelt entity,
He, always with me, the djinn in my mind.

In flowing whispers to each, we tell
Of the flame in our hearts we have sown.
He, granting one wish, the djinn in my mind.

To that, wishing that I he wouldn't forget,
Even though I was never a lass.
He, of Adam like me, the djinn in my mind.

---

A POEM WRITTEN IN DEAREST BLOOD

---

Dearest,
The cut on your skin
Is my love from within.

Gently from it flood
Feathers of life and love,
Drenching me in blood
Of a wedding dove.

The same blood that folly free
In these vessels of madness
Tethers you and me
To this illustrious darkness

For your wound is but an echo
Merely of my desire to be
Feeling your rapturous sorrow,
Your true love for me.

Dearest,
For my heart you stole,
I will shackle your soul.

---

SYLPHIDS DANCING AROUND ME

---

Light falls beneath me
In sleek, streaking rays
Down to the leaf-laden
Earth of Autumn's ways

In this silence of noon,
Never a thing did move.
Time is freezing, that's
Power Autumn had to prove.

But breaking the empty air
Came down sylphids from the sky
With their melodious breeze,
I let alone a sigh

Of relief, for today the Wind
Has broken Autumn's sorcery
Of miserable frost, now
Sylphids are dancing around me.

---

FROM A WINDOW

---

The Sky beckons to The Earth
In a soft, flowing whisper,
A breeze, soft and tender,
As would fairies dance in mirth.
"Come with me," says The Sky,
"Let us reveal paradise."
To which The Earth replies,
"Where we'll be together, you and I!"
And The Earth, with all its might,
Unfurls its arms of vivid green
Much more than it had ever been,
Reaching for the hand of light.
But as much as The Earth wants to reach mark,
The light disappears and The Sky gets dark.

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ETHEREAL

---

Like a grain of sand
In a desolate strand
Scorched by
The flaming hand
Of the sun
We are.

Like a leaf in fall
Within the forest hall
Where frost
Takes its toll
For winter
We are.

Just a grain of sand
Upon wasted land,
Stirred up,
No mercy at hand,
Always
Windblown.

Just a leaf in fall
Heeding winter's call,
Stirred up,
No mercy at all,
Always
Windblown.

AAAHHHHHHH!

At last, a favorable template....guess it just needs a little polishing. Hehehehe.

I'll be posting poetry here next time. Watch out.

Yes!!! For the first time! My very own blog!!! Hahahaha....

I just wish I have something to put in here.....

Right now...I am a little sad...Grandma had just passed away...

Don't worry...gonna be okay soon. Just wait 'til I get my PC back...gonna make an animation for this site...